Have we ever been faced with times in our lives when we can not stop ideas, thoughts from running in and out of minds. Some of the thoughts bring you hope but most of them wear you down. Your mind gets curious and goes on rampage trying to figure out what the hidden answers could be? You try to sleep but the morning dawns and your soul is upset..your soul is troubled within you and your personality is slowly distorted or you become erratic?
I am not trying to describe beginning of madness, I believe I am trying to find the best way to learn to let go of dreams, wishes and plans that we come to realize are not feasible. I believe this is the beginning of the internal turmoil because when we don’t let go, we start to search for justification as to why certain unfeasible dreams deserve to live on.
It could be a failed love affair, marriage , job aspiration or even a failed holiday plan. The minute we hold on to something that is already lost, our mind tries to find the better option or other way out. In some cases these options have led us to success but is it worth the time, resources and energy? We keep climbing this hill where as it may be just a grain of sand. We convince ourselves that this is it and so much time is lost , something that we will never get back.
Would it not be much better if we could make each moment count because that is all we have. why do we chase after waterfalls? Why do I talk about this today? Last week, I had breathing problem and thought I had developed asthma but when I visited the doctor, she counseled me and advised me to let go of the tension in my mind and heart… all my vitals were fine and my physical exam excellent (Thank God)..
I went home a troubled soul, could this be what they call stress? I had no idea I was stressed, I try to live a healthy life but I was wrong, big time wrong…this was the result of the rain in my mind, the rain of thoughts, something that is good but can get very toxic…
Tonight I urge you take joy in the simple joys of life, the moments we have today and let go of the waterfalls.. when the rain comes, let the rainbow in your heart remind you of when its time to let go.
Saturday, 30 May 2009
Monday, 4 May 2009
GASP FOR BREATH…..
Through the hospital blinds, I see faces, expressions of despair of worry and perhaps for some of the faces it’s fatigue. The road has been too long and the baggage of life is wearing them down, for the young ones, some may be bearing the baggage handed down from their ancestors. They are all strangers to me and the breathing masks over the noses of most of them shows that they are in need of someone to send them just an ounce of strength to breathe again. Tears roll down my face as I walk through the corridors of this hospital, it’s a place that you see the once strong body of a man, woman or child become fragile and in some cases lifeless..
The times now make the matter grave; the stifle tears at the corners of their eyes or the line of worry on the loved ones beside their beds tell it all. Who knows what will become of their loved ones. How often do we take fore granted that we have the gift to breathe; the gift to see the sun shine bright and see the blue sky. The strength in our feet can help us move to see the end of our daily road. Do we ever stop to think what if the next minute our feet will fail us? What if the air we breathe was suddenly taken away or made foul. When we have to gasp and struggle to fuel our lungs with oxygen?
As I walked further the corridors I think on if I tell the people close to me how much they mean to me everyday. Do I take this fore granted? When my strength fails me, will I have someone by my bedside to hold my hand? Would the person choose to be there or do it by obligation? When we love, do we do it unconditionally? Our hearts are free and so is our will, what choice do we make today? Self gratification and indulgence? Why don’t we reach out to share the strength we have with those that need it. The person may be a stranger but the heart knows no stranger. A simple smile I share with the man who lay frail on his sick bed, made me realize that I didn’t have to have the money, or material stuff to make someone’s world better.
I have a powerful gift, the gift to make someone’s day brighter, and the gift to be able to share my strength and hold someone’s frail hands. Give a gentle hug of assurance. What more do I need when I don’t the financial capabilities to waive their imminent bills, unpaid mortgages or loans? Today, I make a simple vow in my heart, to try and make someone’s day better, to smile even when I am on the verge of tears, the smile maybe cracked but for someone who needs it, it maybe just the hope for another chance. For someone who gasps for air, I will say a gentle prayer to the giver of live to breathe life into their hearts….
The times now make the matter grave; the stifle tears at the corners of their eyes or the line of worry on the loved ones beside their beds tell it all. Who knows what will become of their loved ones. How often do we take fore granted that we have the gift to breathe; the gift to see the sun shine bright and see the blue sky. The strength in our feet can help us move to see the end of our daily road. Do we ever stop to think what if the next minute our feet will fail us? What if the air we breathe was suddenly taken away or made foul. When we have to gasp and struggle to fuel our lungs with oxygen?
As I walked further the corridors I think on if I tell the people close to me how much they mean to me everyday. Do I take this fore granted? When my strength fails me, will I have someone by my bedside to hold my hand? Would the person choose to be there or do it by obligation? When we love, do we do it unconditionally? Our hearts are free and so is our will, what choice do we make today? Self gratification and indulgence? Why don’t we reach out to share the strength we have with those that need it. The person may be a stranger but the heart knows no stranger. A simple smile I share with the man who lay frail on his sick bed, made me realize that I didn’t have to have the money, or material stuff to make someone’s world better.
I have a powerful gift, the gift to make someone’s day brighter, and the gift to be able to share my strength and hold someone’s frail hands. Give a gentle hug of assurance. What more do I need when I don’t the financial capabilities to waive their imminent bills, unpaid mortgages or loans? Today, I make a simple vow in my heart, to try and make someone’s day better, to smile even when I am on the verge of tears, the smile maybe cracked but for someone who needs it, it maybe just the hope for another chance. For someone who gasps for air, I will say a gentle prayer to the giver of live to breathe life into their hearts….
Sunday, 26 April 2009
BEHIND CLOSED DOORS
Walking through Batuta mall last evening, I realized that I loved observing human behavior. Please don’t get me wrong since I am not a pervert with binoculars on a dark balcony. I just enjoyed watching people at a close range. From the forced smile on a couple’s face to the innocent genuine laughter and glee of a young one, the message is clear; we all strive to be happy. A task I consider noble but the road that leads to it is hard to accept.
Have you ever been in a situation when you forge a smile or affection yet deep inside you are tearing apart? When every one around you thinks you have a perfect life, perfect body, beauty , partner or even career? Many a times we force ourselves to live in the frame set by the people around us. They set the standards and since we want to play the perfect life we play puppet. When our parents, siblings or even partners set high goals for us and we strain to attain and forget the whole essence of having loved ones in our lives.
We are forced to live behind masks of fame, make up and material value. The world can be lonely at that point; it’s when you wake up beside someone you don’t really want to spend the rest of your life with; when you sit behind a desk that you don’t want sit or better when you wear make up that erodes your faith in the beautiful natural skin you were born with. Many a times we are responsible for creating the perfect lives before the world audience. The desire to have possessions of great aesthetic value overwhelms us, and we buy and continue to buy. The credit card debt piles and continues to pile up, all in the name of living the goog life.
The toughest moment comes when we close the doors behind us and get lost in the bathrooms at the end of the day. The reflection in the mirror shows you who you truly are and think on what you had dreamed for yourself. Your thoughts go to when you let other people’s dreams become your dreams. You feel lost. This is the time when the tears of bitterness, regret and uncertainty flow freely. The loads of make up powder are washed off gently by the warm water, you are naked before your true world; the world of your reflection. Your friends are gone and perhaps your spouse is dead asleep. The children dead asleep. This is the time you reflect on who you really are. Is it really worth it? Is it worth making Hollywood out of our own lives?
How many times do we trap our loved ones in situations that they genuinely don’t want to be? Why do we put them in prison for the sake of love and loyalty? Do we think about what goes on in the mind and heart behind closed doors? When the curtains of the scene in our life comes falling; who will stand with us at the back stage? Will we be alone after the moment of glory? When forced a smile unto the world. Who are we? This is the question we should ask ourselves.
Let’s work hard to turn those tears that fall behind closed doors into laughter. Its simple just as in my introduction, think of the laughter of a child; why is it so healing and reassuring? simply because they believe and hope; they live in the truth…they face the truth each and every moment…
We may have lost the innocence they posses but we can still tell ourselves the truth and live to nourish the “ I” deep within us.
Behind closed doors, we shouldn’t be standing alone, someone should be there with us………..
Have you ever been in a situation when you forge a smile or affection yet deep inside you are tearing apart? When every one around you thinks you have a perfect life, perfect body, beauty , partner or even career? Many a times we force ourselves to live in the frame set by the people around us. They set the standards and since we want to play the perfect life we play puppet. When our parents, siblings or even partners set high goals for us and we strain to attain and forget the whole essence of having loved ones in our lives.
We are forced to live behind masks of fame, make up and material value. The world can be lonely at that point; it’s when you wake up beside someone you don’t really want to spend the rest of your life with; when you sit behind a desk that you don’t want sit or better when you wear make up that erodes your faith in the beautiful natural skin you were born with. Many a times we are responsible for creating the perfect lives before the world audience. The desire to have possessions of great aesthetic value overwhelms us, and we buy and continue to buy. The credit card debt piles and continues to pile up, all in the name of living the goog life.
The toughest moment comes when we close the doors behind us and get lost in the bathrooms at the end of the day. The reflection in the mirror shows you who you truly are and think on what you had dreamed for yourself. Your thoughts go to when you let other people’s dreams become your dreams. You feel lost. This is the time when the tears of bitterness, regret and uncertainty flow freely. The loads of make up powder are washed off gently by the warm water, you are naked before your true world; the world of your reflection. Your friends are gone and perhaps your spouse is dead asleep. The children dead asleep. This is the time you reflect on who you really are. Is it really worth it? Is it worth making Hollywood out of our own lives?
How many times do we trap our loved ones in situations that they genuinely don’t want to be? Why do we put them in prison for the sake of love and loyalty? Do we think about what goes on in the mind and heart behind closed doors? When the curtains of the scene in our life comes falling; who will stand with us at the back stage? Will we be alone after the moment of glory? When forced a smile unto the world. Who are we? This is the question we should ask ourselves.
Let’s work hard to turn those tears that fall behind closed doors into laughter. Its simple just as in my introduction, think of the laughter of a child; why is it so healing and reassuring? simply because they believe and hope; they live in the truth…they face the truth each and every moment…
We may have lost the innocence they posses but we can still tell ourselves the truth and live to nourish the “ I” deep within us.
Behind closed doors, we shouldn’t be standing alone, someone should be there with us………..
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